Real Time with Bill Maher, #354, 05/15/15 "Killing it"

Carsick: John Waters
Hitchhikes Across America

by Catherine Giordano

Bill Maher and guests were killing it on Friday May 12, 2015.  on episode #354 of "Real Time with Bill Maher." We had serious conversation, laced with witty jokes and put downs. And, sad to say, it had not just metaphorical killing, but some real death to talk about.  

 

Presidential candidates

Bill Maher began the show with jokes about Mitt Romney, the former Republican presidential candidate who got into the 2016 race for about five minutes. Now that he is out of the race, he can do fun things like have a charity boxing match with Evander Holyfield.  Maher quipped, “I guess he just likes getting beat by a black man.” On Saturday morning, I saw the results of the match. Romney lost. 

“You heard about the big train wreck? But enough about the Jeb Bush campaign. “ Good one Maher. A simple question about the Iraq war turned into a four day-train wreck for Jeb Bush. Maher said, “He’s the only one who could answer a simple yes or no question two different ways and be wrong each time.  

Actually, it was four different ways, but who is counting?  Bush capped it off by saying, “We don’t need ObamaCare. We have the I-watch.” And he’s supposed t be the smart one? He’s killing his own campaign.  

Even the ultra conservative on the panel Chares Murray was amazed that Bush could not answer the question. [Charles Murray is a paleoconservative and paleolibertarian—defined as someone who advocates tradition, limited government and civil society, along with religious, regional, national and Western identity.  He’s also a political scientist, author, columnist, pundit, and scholar at The American Enterprise Institute.  He is the author of several books. His most recent book is By the People: Rebuilding Liberty Without Permission.  

Panelist Heather McGhee said “George W. Bush did a lot to this country that his brother will have to answer questions about.” She is President of Demos, a public policy organization dedicated to increasing social and economic equality in America.  

John Waters wants Hillary to win so Bill can be First Lady. He’d like to see Bill be a First Lady like Mamie Eisenhower. [John Waters is always so funny  He’s a film director, screenwriter, actor, stand-up comedian, journalist, visual artist, art collector, and author of a (sort of) memoir, Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America. Waters is being honored by the British Film Institute in September for his 50-film oeuvre which includes his cult hits Pink Flamingos and Hairspray.]

John Waters was the mid-show guest  in June of 2014. He discussed his book, Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America, on that show. Read about it in my review and recap titled, “Spinning.”

The train wreck

The train derailment in Philadelphia killed eight people. Yet, the next day Congress voted to cut Amtrak funding. Maher said that they objected to subsidizing transportation with taxes “as opposed to the interstate highway system which is a natural-occurring geographical formation.”  



Heather McGhee

Heather McGhee said, This is no way to run a country.” While we are refusing to repair crumbling bridges from 100 years ago, across the pond, our competitors are doing broad-band, wind farms, etc. They are doing the things we taught them.”    

Maher said, “We can’t have victory for America because it might be seen as a victory for Obama. Murray tried to blame the problems on regulations. Maher pointed out that the stimulus package Obama managed to push through got things done.  

McGhee delivered the knock-out punch. “They are killing programs because they are afraid regulations would hold back the projects. That makes no sense.” 

Progressive Programs

Mayor Bill de Blasio of New York wants to organize progressive leaders.  Progressives want common sense programs to improve the lives of the middle-class: A living-wage minimum-wage, sick leave, family leave, universal pre-K, etc. Republicans say it costs too much, but Maher pointed out the country had plenty of money for useless military aircraft. The F22 cost $67 billion and was never used; The F35 cost $1.57 Trillion and it doesn’t work.  

Murray said, “If they adopt this agenda, they will get wiped out.”   

Maher said that Republican citizens support these proposals, even though Republican politicians don’t.  He said, “The donor class is the gatekeeper.” 

 

The interview

"Heretic" by Ayaan Hirsi Ali

The interview was with Ayaan Hirsi Ali, Somali-born American human rights activist, writer, and politician. She is critical of female genital mutilation and Islam and Muslims. She supports women's rights and atheism. She is the author of several books. Her newest book is Heretic: Why Islam Needs a Reformation Now. 

Her personal journey is amazing. She suffered genital mutilation at age 5. Her father tried to force her into a marriage, but she managed to escape to the Netherlands. She later emigrated to the United States.  

Maher and Ali agreed that liberals must stand up for women’s rights and not hid behind claims of cultural difference. Ali said, “Yes, some women like the burka, but millions do not like it.” 

She is calling for Islam to have a “reformation.”  She said, “We must stop investing in life after death instead of life before death. We must give up Sharia law. Holy war must be replaced with holy peace.”  

Calls for an “Islamic Reformation” are making an analogy with the Protestant Revolution. I don’t remember my history all that well, but how long did it take to “reform Christianity, how many wars, and how many dead? Religious reform does not go down easy. 

Religion

Perhaps religion is dying a slow death. The Pew Poll on religion is done every seven years. The 2015 poll shows that in the United States, the proportion who say they are Christian has gone from 78% to 70%.   

The “Nones,” people with no religious affiliation, are now at 23%. Among Millennials, 35% are “Nones.”  

This led to the mid show comedy segment –The King James Franco Bible.

• Honor your father and mother… so you can live in their basement. 
• Thou shall not steal.. except for music online.
• When our Lord returns…Uber will be there.

Killer Mike

"Run the Jewels" with Killer Mike

The mid-show guest was the rap artist known as Killer Mike. He is a rap recording artist and activist against racially- motivated police violence. He has several music CDs including Run the Jewels. 

Mike talked about the problem of cops killing black men. He said we need community policing. It’s not enough to just have black cops, the cops must live in the neighborhoods they police. And good cops must turn in bad cops. 

Maher mentioned that Bill O’Reilly is always going after rappers. He blames the decline in the numbers of Christians on rappers. Maher pointed out that blacks are the least likely group to leave Christianity. 

 

Jesus was a black guy with a posse of homies. He was against government. And everyone like him better when he was dead.

 

Brit for Brains

Bill Maher’s final New Rules bit was about the use of British accents in American culture to convey gravitas. Things just sound better with an American accent. Maher said, “They have the gravitas; we have the swag.” 

“Face it,” Bill said. “We are not a serious people. We drink wine out of a box. We invented Mormons. And Bill O’Reilly is a best seller. And the Iraq war sounded a whole lot better coming out of Tony Blair’s mouth “

 

Killing it, Maher!

When comics are funny, they are said to be killing. Bill Maher kills every week. But not for the next two weeks. He’s on tour in Europe so there is a two week hiatus of the show. He’ll be back on Friday, June 5, 2015.

 

Bill Maher’s Guests:  May 15, 2015  

The interview

 Ayaan Hirsi Ali: Somali-born American human rights activist, writer, and politician. She is critical of female genital mutilation and Islam and Muslims. She supports women's rights and atheism. She is the author of several books. Her newest book is Heretic: Why Islam Needs a Reformation Now 

The mid-show guest 
Michael Render, aka Killer Mike: Rap recording artist and activist against racially- motivated police violence. He has several music CDs including Run the Jewels. 

The panel included: 

John Waters: Film director, screenwriter, actor, stand-up comedian, journalist, visual artist, art collector, and author of a (sort of) memoir, Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America. Waters is being honored by the British Film Institute in September for his 50-film oeuvre which includes his cult hits Pink Flamingos and Hairspray.
 

Heather McGhee: President of Demos, a public policy organization dedicated to increasing social and economic equality in America.  



Charles Murray"By the People"

Charles Murray: Paleoconservative and paleolibertarian political scientist, author, columnist, pundit, and scholar at The American Enterprise Institute.  He is the author of several books. His most recent book is By the People: Rebuilding Liberty Without Permission. (A paleoconservative is someone who advocates tradition, limited government and civil society, along with religious, regional, national, and Western identity.)

HBO "Real Time with Bill Maher" #320 June 6, 2014 "Spinning"

Spinning

by Catherine Giordano

A whole lot of spinning going on during HBO’s “Real Time with Bill Maher.” Episode 320, with aired on Friday June 6, 2014.  He’s the recap, review and commentary.

 

Rumplestiltskin wanted flax spun into gold in the children’s fairytale. Similarly Republicans have taken another innocuous event and they are trying to spin it to scandal. The event is the return of Bowe Bergdalh, a prison of war being held in Afghanistan in exchange for five prisoners of war held in Guantamo Bay by the United States.  Oh well, at least it got the Republicans to shut up about Benghazi for a few minutes.

 

Maher devoted his whole monologue to the issue. He had a lot of funny lines. I’ll give just a few here.

 

·         Fox News said we don’t want to weigh in until all the facts are distorted.

 

·        We don’t trade prisoners for hostages; we trade arms for hostages (a reference to Iran-contra.)

 

·         They say Bergdahl walked off the job—who does he think he is –Sarah Palin?

See the full recap of the monolog at Bill Maher Rules.

 

Later on Maher had still more to say on the topic of Bergdahl’s release. He said that releasing five Guantanamo prisoners is no big deal even if they go back to Afghanistan.  “It is like having five more personal trainers in L.A.”  And, “If they are so bad, how come we caught them?” And later, about Obama negotiating with the enemy, “They want this to be like the Real Housewives—throw a drink in their faces. That what we do, we talk to people.”

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The interview was with Ralph Reed, a conservative political activist, first executive director of Christian Coalition, and now head of Faith and Freedom Coalition. My guess is that Reed wanted to be on the show to plug his new book, Awakening: How America Can Turn from Economic and Moral Destruction Back to Greatness and Maher wanted to have him on the show so he could do a little Bible bashing.

Now I have nothing against religion bashing, that is, pointing out the inconvenient truths and moral contradictions of the Bible. The problem is, it’s an exercise in futility—no one’s mind is changed.  Maher points out the urgings to stone women for illicit sex and the approval of slavery in the Bible, and Reed counters by saying it is the Old Testament saying those things and Jesus did not say things like that. Maher responds, “So it is the Jew God who is bad?” The line got a laugh, but not as big a laugh as when Reed said, “It was a different kind of slavery then.” Unlike Maher, Reed was not trying to be funny. Evidently, according to Reed, there is a good kind of slavery.  

One of the panelists was Nicolle Wallace, a political commentator, former communications chief for George W. Bush, former senior advisor for the McCain-Palin campaign and author of several (White House themed) novels, most recently, It’s Classified: A Novel. I hope her novels offer more variety than her political commentary. Like a demented jack-in-the-box she kept popping up, no matter what the topic: “Obama has had six years, what has he done?”  Finally, Maher had to slap her hard across the face (verbally, not literally) and tell her she knows very well why Obama has not been able to accomplish a lot of the things on his agenda—Republican obstructionism.  I always thought Wallace was better than that—I thought she was a serious political analyst—evidently she is a spinning hack.  

It was left to another conservative panelist, Jim Geraghty, a conservative blogger and regular contributor to the National Review and the author of the (roman a clef) novel, The Weed Agency: A Comic Tale of Federal Bureaucracy Without Limits to try to present the conservative case in a reasonable manner.  Not that his ideas are reasonable--he said raising the minimum wage would raise the price of a cup of coffee at Starbucks to $20.  

The third panelist Anthony Weiner, a former congressman (D, NY) forced to resign from Congress over a sexting scandal and a former New York mayoral candidate forced to resign from the race over a sexting scandal who now works as a columnist for a web news site, Business Insider, was his usual impassioned self, arguing for the liberal point of view, with facts, reason, and passion. (Speaking of passion, I’m glad no one made mention of is sexting—he has been beat up enough over that. And the mistakes he made in his personal life don’t negate his political positions. Weiner told Geraghty that minimum wage workers eat at McDonalds, so workers with more money to spend will bring McDonald’s more business.  (Several cities and several companies have already raised their minimum wages and they are doing very well.)  

Weiner had a great line. He said, “We take your ideas and do them and now you don’t like those ideas. What ideas do you like?”  It was a rhetorical question—the two conservatives on the panel had no answer. 

The mid-show guest was John Waters, a film director, screenwriter, actor, stand-up comedian, journalist, visual artist, art collector, and author of a (sort of) memoir, Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America. He talked about the adventure that led to his new book. He stuck his thumb out in front of his house and traveled across the country—it took him 21 rides and nine days. He’s a very funny and interesting person.  Maher said that  at age 50, comfort is very important to him, but Waters, who is considerably older said, “You can’t get too comfortable.  It hurts your street cred.”  Waters also said, “Hitchhiking is like phone sex. The more you talk, the further he’ll take you. “I’m putting this book on my “To Read” list. However, I won’t be taking his advice and hitchhiking anywhere, not even to the bus stop, much less across the country.

Read more about John Waters (including his interview on The Colbert Report) on the blog: Bill Maher Rules.

The mid-show comedy segment as about how some politicians want to be elected so bad they don’t care how they do it.  They will change parties.  They will even change states, as Scott Brown has done. (He was senator R-MA and now he running as R-NH.)  It seems that some will go so far as to change their names. Scott Fistler, has not had much success getting elected in an Hispanic district in Arizona running as a Republican. Now he has legally changed his name to Cesar Chavez, and is running for Congress in the Democratic primary. He is not Hispanic and he is running against two real Democrats who really are Hispanic—he is not expected to even come close to winning.)   

This prompted Maher to do his mid-show comedy bit about political posters for other Republicans who might want to change their names to attract minority voters.  Here’s a few of the tag lines, although it is much funnier if you see the posters.    

·         Cheech McDonnell: Don’t stop thinking about tamale.

 

·         Juan Boehner: My face is red and I’m crying because this sauce is muy caliente.

 

·         Sarah James Olmos. I can see Tijuana from mi casa. 

·        To attract African Americans Chris Christie will become Andre 3000 Pounds: a chicken and waffle in every pot. 

·       To attract gays Ted Cruz will become Ted Cruising and his slogan will be “Drill Baby Drill.” 

In New Rules the final segment was named “Here Comes Gunny Boo Boo.” Maher said, “Never think it can’t get crazier.” He was referring to the people who carry guns everywhere. 

Maher quipped, “You’re in Home Depot to buy a toilet seat. You are not likely to meet armed resistance,”  followed by “Putin has not annexed Chipolte.”  

He made fun of the open-carry nuts who say if we don’t use it , we will lose it.  “No, that is frequent flyer miles.” 

Maher called them “ammo-sexualists” adding “Don’t deny it is a romantic relationship.  You are taking it out to dinner.”  

Maher also pointed out that don’t-leave-home-without-your-assault-rifle types did what progressives couldn’t do. They go guns banned.  (Several restaurants have asked patrons not to bring guns into their stores.)   

Maher ended with “If you want to die in a fast food restaurant, you will have to do it the old fashioned way by eating their food.”   

My head was not exactly spinning like the demon possessed girl in The Exorcist [Director’s Cut: Extended Edition], but the one-liners and punditry kept my head spinning pretty much throughout the show.

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Guests: June 6, 2014

John Waters: film director, screenwriter, actor, stand-up comedian, journalist, visual artist, and art collector, and author of a (sort of) memoir, Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America 

Ralph Reed: conservative political activist, first executive director of Christian Coalition, now head of Faith and Freedom Coalition, author of several political books. His latest book is Awakening: How America Can Turn from Economic and Moral Destruction Back to Greatness. He has also written a novel, Ballots and Blood: A Novel  

Jim Geraghty: conservative blogger and regular contributor to National Review, author of the (roman a clef) novel, The Weed Agency: A Comic Tale of Federal Bureaucracy Without Limits 

Nicolle Wallace: political commentator, former communications chief for George W. Bush, former senior advisor for the McCain-Palin campaign, and author of several (White House themed) novels, most recently, It’s Classified: A Novel 

Anthony Weiner: former congressman (D, NY), forced to resign from Congress over a sexting scandal, former New York City mayoral candidate, forced to resign from the race over a sexting scandal  (Some people never learn.)